What I’ve Learned About Love + Relationships From Writing For A Wedding Magazine
Over the past year or so I have had the absolute privilege of freelance writing for maybe the most beautiful, authentic wedding magazine in store’s right now, Together Journal.
Founded by Greta Kenyon, the editor and photographer wanted to create a wedding magazine that was a more accurate reflection of the direction weddings were heading in today, a magazine that was less cupcake-dresses and airbrushed faces and more, for lack of a better word, real. When it comes to marriage, weddings, proposals and honeymoons, there truly aren’t any rules anymore, and Together Journal is committed to celebrating love in all of it’s weird and wonderful shapes and forms.
During my time writing for Together Journal I have poured through countless “real weddings”; interviews with real-life couples, discovering how they met, fell in love and ultimately planned and executed their dream day – and it should come as no surprise that no two couples were the same.
Here are a few of the lessons I have learnt from Together Journal and it’s contributors about creating and maintaining a love that lasts.
I learned that some couples know immediately that they are soul mates, some take six years to realise, and some don’t even believe in the concept of soul mates – they just know that they love each other today, and will probably love each other fifty years from now. Don’t compare your garden with your neighbours.
I learned that almost all proposals are flawed. Whether it’s a thunderstorm, a severe case of food-poisoning, a grumpy mood or a cancelled flight, learn to roll with the punches and keep your eye on the prize.
I learned that love letters are always well received. Write them. A lot of them. And always by hand.
I learned that sometimes you need to break-up in order to realise you want to be together forever.
I learned that a two-week business trip can turn into three years and a wedding.
I learned that your relationship will sometimes feel like walking on Lego but you must persevere.
I learned that the best relationships are those in which you are a trampoline and a safety net for the other person.
I learned that it is an inherently bad decision to move house while you are planning a wedding.
I learned that even the strongest of relationships can be threatened if you watch an episode of your favourite series without your significant other.
I learned that conflict is a part of love and it doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed. If you care enough about a person to be bothered by a disagreement, that’s usually a good sign.
I learned that next time you’re angry at your partner for not being “in tune” with what you want, first make sure that you actually know what you want. Most of the time we don’t. Most of the time we have no idea what we want but we decide that our boyfriend should know and should have given it to us yesterday.
I learned that if you find some old red paint and get a friend to write “TOOT! JUST MARRIED!” on the road outside your house it will feel like your honeymoon every single day.
I learned to start your marriage the same way you want to finish it: bring them a cup of tea in bed, make extra dinner for them to take to work tomorrow, and don’t leave an empty toilet roll in the bathroom.
And I learned that compatibility has very little to do with similarities. Rather, compatibility is based on a mutual agreement to work hard at what you’ve got and ask questions when you reach a bump in the road. Almost all of the couples I have encountered while writing for Together Journal cite their differences as what makes them such a great team and their curiosity as what makes them a strong one.